Sunday, November 27, 2016

Because Snark is Never Out of Place

Via Tengrain, we have a bizarre conflation of obituaries:

Funny, whatever happened to the beard and the fatigues? Of course, this set my smart ass to poetizing:

Here’s the story, of an angry Cuban.
Who was fed up with the bad, oppressing rich.
And chased them all to Miami,
Now ain’t that just a bitch?

Here’s the story, of a man named Castro,
Who was cooking up a Workers’ Paradise.
But he had to go be a mini-Stalin.
Couldn’t he be nice?

Then the one day when this angry Mr Castro,
Had to indulge in all of his vices,
And the shitstorm that ensued, sucked in the great powers.
And we know it as the Cuban Missile Crisis.
The Missile Crisis, The Missile Crisis,
It’s the shitstorm that we call The Missile Crisis.

For those who are unaware of all sitcom traditions...


Emma said...

That’s a good song.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Thanks, snark is something that can't be taken away from us.

Robyn said...

I would watch this.

Vixen Strangely said...

It could have been the "Full House" Theme:

Whatever happened to the beard and the fatigues?
The revolution, the US cars, Cuban internet and tv?
You miss your old familiar friends,
They've been disappeared but waiting
just around the bend--

Everywhere you look
there's an agent of somebody who oppresses you;
there's a heart, a "father" to look up to,
Everywhere you look, there's his face--
someone to answer to!

When you're safe at home, think you're all alone,
your activities might be making him groan...
Everywhere he looks.

(Um, I couldn't resist but feel a little tasteless about it.)

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Have I got a treat, err tweet, for you.