Monday, March 12, 2012

Dreams in the Bastard House

I don't seem to dream, at the very least, I don't typically remember my dreams. Yesterday, though, was an exception- I had a very vivid dream that I was being lambasted by a male Fox News talking head for writing unflattering, though accurate things about the late Andrew Breitbart. For some reason, the talking head in my dream was fixated on my Canadian flag day post in which I wrote that I'd drink a "Bloody Caesar", and he started referring to me as "the Clamato guy". Of all the things to fixate on, this was a weird one- I really haven't mentioned Clamato that often.

I figured I'd take this opportunity to write about Clamato. I drank some Clamato straight, and mixed a bloody Caesar, but I didn't have the ingredients on hand to mix the more outré seeming Clamato vampirito. I enjoyed the taste of Clamato, but was struck by two things- the first thing is that Clamato has a very pronounced celery seed flavor, the celery seed is more pronounced than the "dehyrated clam broth" (I wonder if there's a single facility which produces all the dehyrated clam broth used by Mott's, or if various subcontractors provide clam broth powder to the bottling facilities. Now I want to be your dog a dehyrated clam broth magnate.) flavor. The second thing is that Clamato, while not particularly sweet, contains, of all things, high fructose corn syrup. Reading that, I got the feeling that the people of Mott's are adding HFCS to Clamato just mess with us.

Clamato aside, dreaming about Fox News was pretty bizarre, but it's March, when strange dreams seem to intrude on the minds of creative people. Special note to friends from New Zealand... maybe it's not a good time for a Pacific cruise.

UPDATE: On the subject of dreams, I can't believe I didn't embed a video of one of my all-time favorite scenes in any movie, the "Land of Dreams" sequence in Excalibur:




Teh Wiki tells me that Nicol Williamson, who played Merlin in Excalibur died last December. I wish I had known earlier, because, by virtue of his Merlin performance, he is one of my favorite actors. I know that Merlin's role in Excalibur wasn't supposed to be a comedic one, but Mr Williamson's delivery never fails to crack me up. His delivery of the line, "A dream to some, A NIGHTMARE TO OTHERS!" is perhaps my favorite line in any film.

15 comments:

Another Kiwi said...

HFCS gets added to anything it will mix with. Not a soft drug!!!
Righto BBBB, Riddled staff cruise cancelled

Smut Clyde said...

But we had the itinerary mapped out and everything!

wiley said...

And so, you become that Clamato guy, if only for a post.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Righto BBBB, Riddled staff cruise cancelled

A aeroplane flight over Antarctica would be nice... on second thought...

But we had the itinerary mapped out and everything!

No northerly jaunt to Ys, or Hy Brasil?

And so, you become that Clamato guy, if only for a post

I could totally be that Clamato guy!

Another Kiwi said...

Ah, yeah that itinerary thing. S'long way to row is all I'm saying.

Substance McGravitas said...

Somewhere a Clamato guy is relieved that the burden has finally been taken up by another.

Another Kiwi said...

So the Clamato mantle passes through the generations spreading it's message of shellfish/vegetable fusion

vacuumslayer said...

The weird randomness of this dream is all kinds of tomatoey clammy good. It's just so damn grounded and surreal at the same time. I salute you and your weird dreams, sir. Awesome entry.

Smut Clyde said...

I was given to believe that there are 36 clamato guys in the world at any one time, no more, no less.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

My dad and I finished the Clamato last night.

Now it's off to Vegas, baby!
~

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

S'long way to row is all I'm saying.

That's what interns are for!

Somewhere a Clamato guy is relieved that the burden has finally been taken up by another.

We are legion!

So the Clamato mantle passes through the generations spreading it's message of shellfish/vegetable fusion

When genetic engineering becomes better, we'll have clamato plants!

The weird randomness of this dream is all kinds of tomatoey clammy good. It's just so damn grounded and surreal at the same time. I salute you and your weird dreams, sir. Awesome entry.

Thanks... like I said, I don't dream very often, but this one was vivid!

I was given to believe that there are 36 clamato guys in the world at any one time, no more, no less.

It would seem that way, but in the end, we will all fight to the death, because there can be only one!

My dad and I finished the Clamato last night.

Now it's off to Vegas, baby!


Do you have to drive all the way to Vegas to buy Clamato?

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Believe it or don't, Clamato is one of the very few (we're talking counting them on the fingers of one hand of a sawmill worker) items that Food Lion in Berkeley Springs has cheaper than grocery stores in bigger cities. (I.e., Kroger in Columbus, or Safeway in D.C.)

So now you now.
~

Mandos said...

Even though I very well know what it is and have been to some of them, I am still tickled by the thought of a Food Lion.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Err, KNOW!

I'm excusing all tippos in rush to Vegas.
~

vacuumslayer said...

Jist be sure to keep us apprised next time you dream B^4...especially if the dream involves controversial beverages.