Wednesday, February 9, 2011

With Apologies to Mark Knopfler

I hope this doesn't ruin one of the the classiest, loveliest popular songs of the late 20th Century, but I heard the line, Juliet, when we made love you used to cry, and couldn't help but think of the allegations that America's Oompa Loompa had an affair with a lobbyist:


A lovestruck congressman sings K streetsuss serenade
Laying everybody low with the policies that he made
Finds a convenient scapegoat, "Public workers are overpaid!"
Says something like, "GOP babe, how about it?"

Lisbeth says, "Hey Boehner-boy, you nearly gave me a heart attack"
He's Speaker of the House now, she's singing, "Hey I'm a corporate flack.
You shouldn't come around here, unless the rich folks' taxes are flat.
Anyway, what you gonna do about it?"

Boehner-boy, the dice was loaded from the start,
I love you like the checks I get, playing a lobbyist's part.
There's a place for us, you know the movie song
When will voters realize, the guy they voted for was wrong?


Yeah, I kinda hate me now as well. Sorry folks, but I couldn't let good taste or respect for one of the most distinctive guitar stylists get in the way of a joke. Hopefully this will help to clear the image of Boehner's teary "O" face from your brains.

Good luck with that!

UPDATE: I totally *yoinked* the Boehner as Oompa Loompa thing from Thunder. Gotta give props when they're due!

10 comments:

vacuumslayer said...

I honestly just cannot get over the fact that people like Newt Gingrich, Rush Limbaugh and John Boehner can get people to pork them. I mean, damn. Is the money/power that much of an aphrodisiac? The only way money would work on me in that way is if I ground it up into a fine powder and snorted it.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Is the money/power that much of an aphrodisiac?

It pays the bills!

Another Kiwi said...

Dude, you are a song master! Better than a meat pie and a cold beer

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

High praise indeed from a poet such as yourself! Thankye kindly!

When you get to NYC, first round's on me, old chum!

Brando said...

Look at Boehner, that's the way you do it
You play the voters for the GOP
That ain't working, that's the way you do it
Values for stumping and your chicks for free

TruculentandUnreliable said...

"Hopefully this will help to clear the image of Boehner's teary 'O' face from your brains."

I WAS FINE UNTIL THIS THANKS.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

I WAS FINE UNTIL THIS THANKS.

It could have been worse, it could have been an image of Boehner's boner.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

And I stole the Boehner Oompa Loompa, in turn.

Pretty funny that Boehner was the one trying to get freshmen repukes to keep it in their pants...
~

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Pretty funny that Boehner was the one trying to get freshmen repukes to keep it in their pants...

He couldn't handle the competition.

Hunger Tallest Palin said...

This well may be the brilliantest thing on I've seen all month.

But if you see Mark Knopfler in your neighborhood, RUN LIKE HELL.