For the third time in the space of a week, I'm able to riff off of a classic line delivered by Alec Guinness in the original Star Wars. Yes, once again, it's a post about an elegant weapon for a more civilized age, and this one's a doozy, by which I mean a dookie...
There is no detail about the story of a crazy drunken man attacking police with a full colostomy bag that isn't perfect... the fact that it occurred at the 'Big Ass Honky Tonk Rock N Roll Steakhouse' owned by Kid Rock (himself a colostomy bag) is perfect, the perpetrator's face tattoos, pefect! Now THAT is an
shitty elegant weapon for a more crappy civilized age!
This is truly the American Greatness that Donald Trump sought to recapture in his campaign and maladministration... what could be more emblematic in MAGAland than a drunken boor, enraged at being told not to block a safety exit, flinging his poo at those around him until he is forcibly stopped? This is truly a man who exercises his Amendment Number Two rights. If he is isn't incarcerated in 2022, he'd make a perfect GOP congressional candidate.
I can already see his campaign slogan: "What can brown do for you?"