Friday, November 9, 2012

Total Perspective Vortex

Tonight, I'm basically phoning it in. This post is merely a re-post of an exchange in a Rumproast comment thread between the awesome and not-slackerish-at-all Vixen Strangely and some bastard. Vixen Strangely's original comment is the italicized portion, the section I am responding to has been bolded:

Looking at the way some aspects of the campaign were totally phoned in (“Amercia?” The “off-the-shelf” character of Romney’s vague policy statements. The gimmick choice of a rock star running mate who did exactly zero good for the campaign, as could have been predicted), I figured there was a long-con version of the game Herman Cain and Newt Gingrich were playing—you know, make like it’s a real campaign and then disappear before shit got real. The Hermanator executed that much pretty well, Gingrich less so—he got caught working at it and ended up in campaign debt without, I think, his profile much raised.

I just could never figure out what Romney’s pay-off was. When the “optimistic” and as later admitted, “incorrect” internal poll numbers were leaked, I thought maybe, instead of spin, it was a case of them having two books—the real internal poll numbers, and then the story they gave donors (since it was clear Romney would tell them anything) and other rubes. I just figured Romney was in on it. Now, I don’t know what to think. For all we know, instead of a campaign to get Romney elected, it was all an elaborate money-laundering front for the Mob. And then there’s poor deluded Mittens with Quick Tan on his collar, thinking, “I’m going to be president, someday.” He was born to be had because he wanted it so bad.

Not that I have sympathy for him. But it would make a nice closing scene to the sequel to Game Change. The fireworks display is ordered, the transition web site is about to go live, and there’s those Ohio numbers, not swinging his way. Camera closes in tight on fingers across a cell phone key pad—to customer service at Visa….

Those people got bonuses, once.

I think this is the truth... all his life, Mitt's had people blowing smoke up his ass. Mitt's mother referred to him as her miracle baby. In college, Mitt was referred to as one mighty and strong, destined to lead the country. Even on a basic level, Mormons believe that they will eventually become gods. Everything in Mitt's life conspired to inflate his ego, and to lead him to believe that his victory was inevitable... as his awful wife put it, "It's our turn."

By losing, Mitt basically went through Douglas Adams' Total Perspective Vortex.

Mitt's problem is that he's no Zaphod Beeblebrox, even though, if he had been elected, his primary function would have been to draw attention away from the true rulers of the universe.


ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

you know, make like it’s a real campaign and then disappear before shit got real.

Oh, perfect!

zencomix said...

The money laundering aspect is spot on. Colbert did a segment on it after the Citizens United. You allow anonymous donors to contribute money to campaigns, and golly gee Fat Tony, what should we do with all this cash?

mikey said...

Epistemological Closure. It's not just for retired farmers in Kansas anymore...

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Well, half a billion dollars as a consolation prize makes me feel not a single damn bit sorry for his poor frail bruised ego.

Politics ain't beanbag. Wear a cup.

mikey said...

Wear a cup.

Besides, think how convenient it'll be when it's time to drink some rum!

Smut Clyde said...

Gingrich [...] got caught working at it and ended up in campaign debt

Shirley more accurate to say that his creditors ended up in campaign debt. Gingrich doesn't seem to be feeling the pain.

Dr.KennethNoisewater said...

Yeah, I think his sense of entitlement was, like, out of control huge. But if you think about it, he's the perfect embodiment of the wingnut mindset. They think all Democratic presidents are by their very nature illegitimate. They think they are ENTITLED to the presidency. Mitt just agreed.

Vixen Strangely said...

Heh--the ads for Team Cain are the best reason to believe that the Grift is alive and well and nestled like a semi-thawed viper in the bosom of conservatism. Their high-concept weirdness suggests a pitch with extreme buzzword saturation and to a looney who would, if not inclined for the moment to fund political adverts, simply continue to blow the old trustfund on nuns knitting philodendron cozies for the chillier looking denizens of his greenhouse, or some other zarking fardwarks.

Substance McGravitas said...

I look forward to a long and distracting career in politics for Herman Cain.

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