Wednesday, January 7, 2015

The T00bz Are Alive!

With the Sounds of Sodomy... It seems that a right-wing christianist organization has distributed anti-gay leaflets asking "Should children be exposed to the sounds of sodomy?" Hilarity ensued... Being a snarky Bastard, I don't want to be left out!

Hello penis, my old friend,
I'm sticking you in a rear end.
And as I'm straining at a fundament,
I hear the clergy and the prudes lament,
That the sex acts, I perform
In my bedroom, lead to doom.
Listen! The sounds of sodomy.

On sweaty sheets, I will butt-bone,
Hear my partner start to moan.
'Neath the glow of a fluorescent tube,
I realize I should have used more lube.
When I heard my partner
Crying out in pain, due to strain.
Echoing sounds of sodomy.

And when I empty out my balls,
It echoes down good christian halls,
And a kid will ask his parent,
What the grunting in Flat 4B meant.
When they hear my "O" they will surely get confused,
Mom's not amused.
Mysterious sounds of sodomy!

Manichean dichotomy: Evil and good sodomy.
Clerics feeling up the congregants,
"Laying hands" upon the faithful's pants.
Your wife won't blow, you can get
An annulment stat. Fancy that!
Church-approved sounds of sodomy!

Religious fanatics don't have a sense of humor, but they provide so much unintentional amusement. Apparently no organization now wants to take the credit for this hilariously backfiring campaign. What's no so funny is the religious right's attempt to interfere with the private lives of everyone, even non-believers. The best weapon against authoritarians is mockery, and mockery they got.


Chickpea said...

Was chuckling at the suggestions people were coming up with this morning. You are right, it's the best way to deal with such bloody stupid nonsense. You missed your calling, you should have been a poet!

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I always figured Jesus had to have had a pretty good sense of humor. I mean, if you accept that he was part of the triune god, he had to know how it was going to turn out (and frankly, even if he wasn't; a semi-intelligent reading of human nature would have arrived at the same conclusion), and that the only thing that would soften that painfully obvious conclusion would be wry humor and satire...

Chickpea said...

A shockingly relevant post. Je suis Charlie

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

My internets were dead for a couple. But we're back!