Wednesday, March 15, 2017

Iowa, Land of Intrigue

Roy has a piece up about the right-wingers' reactions to Iowa representative Steve King's racist, xenophobic tweet, and some bastard wrote a waggish comment that he now feels compelled to post on his own blog... the comment was directly inspired by Helmut Monotreme's bit about Iowa's hog farms and feed lots and dairies big enough to suck the water table down to bedrock and drown your favorite lake in a tidal wave of liquid manure:


Hog farms and feed lots and exploding silos,
Even a college that won't invite Milo.
Ponds full of Round-Up that make your eyes sting.
This is the state that elected Steve King.

Big butter sculptures and hot dogs in batter,
Is it a wonder the people get fatter?
Blonde, corn-fed beauties who make your heart sing,
This is the state that elected Steve King.

When the darkies, have their babies, and I'm feeling fright,
I just remember Iowa's Steve King, and he'll keep our country White!



This is, of course, a parody of My Favorite Things from "The Sound of Music", but reading it over again, I find myself running up against Poe's Law- the chorus of this parody could pass as a campaign slogan for Steve King.

As a coda to this post, I have to note that Conservapedia's definition of Poe's Law is a perfect illustration of, you got it, Poe's Law. The post title is *yoinked* from an old "Bloom County" parody of National Geographic which I can't seem to find on the t00bz.

4 comments:

Harry Hamid said...

That's great. I went to law school in Omaha, and Iowa made the enws a lot for its political antics.

My favorite involved pigs. Apparently, Iowan pig farmers store pig waste in what is essentially a dammed-up area. In the winter, the lake of waste is the warmest thing around,and the temperature issues can make the dams explode.

They flood houses, etc.

The legislature tried to do something about it to make it safer, but the state Supreme Court had multiple pig farmers, so the laws would get struck down.

Iowans would get flooded withpig crap because of the corrupt politicians. Literally.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Idiots Out Wandering Around

That's a bit of Wisconsin humor.

Anonymous said...

If you believe the United States will maintain or better its standard of living in any of the areas you regard as important after Euro-American ethnics become an official minority, just say so.

History as applied to other nations is not on your side. Leave aside the superior/inferior angle if you wish. Just consider the revenge angle and will-to-power angle of minority cum majority activists.

Of course these questions assume you are not thoroughgoing deracinated
cosmopolitan.... wannabees.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

The revenge angle, eh? Don't fear, people of color will treat white minorities with the same respect that white people have treated them with... Oh, that's what you're afraid of. Funny, you tacitly acknowledge your guilt and project it on white liberals.

I'm often the only white guy on the subway train at night, last guy off in the Boronx, and I have never been afraid. If you really worried about Western Civilization thriving, I suggest you get civilized.