Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Nein! Nein! Nein!

I can't let Gocart Mozart have all the fun ripping on Herman Cain's horrible 9-9-9 tax plan. Here's my little effort in the "making fun of Herman Cain" song parody sub-genre:


Nine nine nine is the plan
Put out by that pizza man.
It's regressive, dumb as hell.
That is why it polls so well.
The voters in the GOP
Love this kind of fuckery.
Crushing on the pizza man,
With the dumb nine nine nine tax plan.

Nine nine nine is the plan
Put out by that pizza man.
Cut tax on capital gains,
Tax the milk and tax the grains.
Spare the rich and soak the poor,
That's what nine-nine-nine plan's for.
Why should rich folks share the pain?
Cast your vote now for Herman Cain.

Nine nine nine is the plan
Put out by the pizza man.
Working stiffs, hey, life's a bitch.
It's your fault you aren't rich.
"Lazy bums" old Herman mused,
"Just buy clothes and food that's used."
The next election's on the line,
With old Herman's stupid nine nine nine.



Of course, this is a takeoff on the biggest hit by my liebchen Nena Kerner and her eponymous band. For those of you who have lived much of the last three decades under a rock, the video is available, though cannot be embedded. Huh, there's a recently recorded remake of the song, which isn't as good as the original, but Nena still looks fantastic, and there's a moment in which a certain political figure is mocked...

I'm going to reiterate that any disparaging comments about Nena and her eponymous band could very well result in a lifetime ban. I think that, if I were to hear any disparaging comments about Nena made in my presence, I'd give a beating to the mocker. Hell, I'm even kinda pissed at myself for writing this parody... I think that I... uh... just might have to beat myself... just as soon as the video is over.

What the hell are you snickering about?

11 comments:

Smut Clyde said...

Do something with teh Sisters of Mercy, "Nine While Nine". You know you want to.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

I was also trying to do something with Nine Nine Nine.

M. Bouffant said...

OK, I'll take the challenge:

Talk about a one-hit wonder! How many versions has she cranked out? You didn't like the 2002 take?

And really, she looks like a Teutonic Chrissie Hynde.

Frankly, I prefer Katrina & The Waves for sheer pop whatever.

Und auch.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Talk about a one-hit wonder! How many versions has she cranked out? You didn't like the 2002 take?

Why you little!!! One hit wonder, she put out at least two albums.

And really, she looks like a Teutonic Chrissie Hynde.

You make that sound like a bad thing...

Frankly, I prefer Katrina & The Waves for sheer pop whatever.

I got no beef with Katrina, and former Soft Boy Kimberley Rew was guitarist for the Waves. Love the combination of gorgeous and grotesque that the Soft Boys delivered.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

For the record, here's my favorite Katrina and the Waves Song.

Damn, that's one gorgeous voice.

Smut Clyde said...

she looks like a Teutonic Chrissie Hynde.

There not even any imaginable universe in which that is a bad thing.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

You ain't kidding, old friend!

Helmut Monotreme said...

How bout Falco? Can we disparage Falco in your presence?

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

I'll add this to the ahemorrhage.
~

Laura said...

"I... uh... just might have to beat myself."

And no picture for me!?? You *ARE* a mean mofo, aren't you?

((Hugs))
Laura

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

"I... uh... just might have to beat myself."

Do you need lube?