Monday, April 15, 2013

Taxed Just Fine, Thank You!

Today is the day when income taxes are due in the United States. I actually finished my last Thursday and had them postmarked and in the mail on Friday. For all those who piss and moan about paying their taxes, just remember that taxes are the dues you pay to be a member of the "developed society" club. I like my roads paved and my garbage collected, thank you very much.

In addition, I always pay extra elective amounts on my New York State tax form. I always elect to pay the "make a gift to wildlife" fund (I'm an avid hiker), the "breast cancer fund" (I like boobs), the "prostate cancer fund" (I gots balls, brassy ones in fact), and the "missing and exploited children's fund" (I volunteer with kids, so these sorts of organizations resonate with me). Being a Yonkers resident, I also pay a modest city tax.

I actually enjoy paying my taxes. I like sitting down with the forms and a pad of scrap paper and doing the math. I don't even mind writing out the checks. I chalk my mature attitude toward paying taxes to being an adult. If you're complaining about your taxes, chances are, you're a big baby at best, a sociopath and grifter at worst.


mikey said...

The first time I made a certifiable "buttload" of money legally was 1992. I got blindsided by the tax man - I had NO idea how to manage my finances as a "highly compensated professional" and it took me a couple years to dig completely out of that hole. But I went out and got an accountant to help me deal with my taxes make financial decisions because I don't know the rules, and if you play in a game in which only the other side knows the rules you will ALWAYS lose. The amount of money I have saved is massive compared to the fees I have paid, and I have never been audited.

But that year, complaining and whining to everyone who would listen, it was pointed out to me a number of times that this is, in fact, a very GOOD problem to have, and the only reason I owed these taxes was that I had made that previously mentioned buttload of money. And I completely internalized that message, so that in the future, the more I owed in taxes the happier I was, because that was an indication that I had a successful year financially, and I was enjoying a life that was unavailable to people who get a six hundred dollar refund check.

So yeah - though it's been a few lean years recently and the future is uncertain with a chance of poverty, bring it on, IRS, sez I...

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Definitely better to owe a lot because you made a lot, rather than the didn't make anything.

I've had both experiences...

squirrel_e_girl said...

"For all those who piss and moan about paying their taxes, just remember that taxes are the dues you pay to be a member of the "developed society" club. I like my roads paved and my garbage collected, thank you very much."

I agree wholeheartedly!! I love your idea that Taxes = "Developed Society Club" membership dues.


I'd wager that the people who complain about having to pay taxes are the very same folks who are lightning quick to complain about roads with potholes and emergency room wait-times.

Rev. paleotectonics said...

Also, too:
Bridges remaining upright
Children getting education (esp. about staying off my lawn)
My water not containing active poop-cultures.

I don't mind my taxes at all for your very reasons, although if right-wing jackholes insist they don't want to pay for clean water, I will invoke my desire not to pay for OilCo. subsidies, wars, anything in Teh South, and the churches can damn well afford to be taxed.

anne said...

just in , on my way home this evening .. i spotted my neighbour larry standing oddly in the road .. i wandered over to see what he was up to ..there was a pot' hole by a water drain'grid the size of a small car .. , it wasn't there when i went out .. , odd odd odd .. .

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