I'm so glad I enrolled in the school of snappy comebacks years ago, it comes in handy in various situations. During our nighttime events, we typically illuminate our sites with lanterns to provide some atmosphere. During last night's event, a teenager deliberately broke one of our lanterns and he and his cohorts were ejected from the premises. After the event, the Creative Director of the event was mulling over it, and asked me the question:
"Why would anybody punch a lantern?"
"Because it killed his father."
In TV Tropes terms, one of the roles I play is Deadpan Snarker.