Friday, September 9, 2011

Man on Dog, Indeed!

Yikes, breaking news item from the T.M.I. wire services. "Hasn't got a hope in Hell" GOP presidential candidate Rick Santorum has a tale to tell from his early days of politicking, a story about a man and a dog. For the sake of brevity, I'll cut to the punchline of the story:

The lady comes back she hands me the water. I’m patting the dog. And taking a drink. The next thing I know I have this warm sensation. And I immediately jump up and there on my tan pants, is a wet spot where you do not want a wet spot.

Note that, at no time does Rick mention that the dog peed on him. Yeah, a normal person would assume that the dog peed on him, as Rick no doubt intended. Unfortunately, Rick's secret is out- the reason he stands by his "man on dog" comment is that he bears the terrible burden of cynosexual arousal, and the crushing despair of thwarted cynoerotic consummation.

Is it "man on dog" when the dog is on top?


ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Santorum is all over this.

vacuumslayer said...

Listen, there's nothing I'd put past the Masters of Projection. If they're accusing men of being dog-fuckers, you'd better believe there's some pretty hot dog-fucking going on in wingnut world.

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Santorum is all over this.

Yikes, the epidemic is spreading!

you'd better believe there's some pretty hot dog-fucking going on in wingnut world.

Judging from the pictures of corndog fellatio, I'm sure the hotdog fucking isn't pretty! Wait, what?

Substance McGravitas said...

That headline is awesome.

Dog pee can’t stop Santorum

Pokémon attacks are getting more exotic all the time.

Laura said...

What kind of a jack ass would still go around to other houses with dog pee on his crotch?
One that would disrespect my baby "Piers Flippin Morgan". Yes, I use a British accent when I say it in my head. :)

Thank for the 29th b-day wishes. I appreciate it. You're my new favourite person. :)

Ciao for Niao!