Is there no help for the plutocrat's son? Poor little rich boy Mitt Romney is convinced that he will be the victim of a vast left wing conspiracy:
"There will be an effort by the quote vast left wing conspiracy to work together to put out their message and to attack me. They're going to do everything they can to divert from the message people care about, which is a growing economy that creates more jobs and rising incomes. That's what people care about."
Yeah, Mitt, there's a vast left wing conspiracy to make you seem like an out-of-touch, condescending douchebag. The conspiracy is a wide one... everybody seems to be in on it. Cookie enthusiasts are in on it. Young black schoolchildren are in on it. Impertinent reporters are in on it. Dogs are in on it. Mothers who receive public assistance are in on it. Mitt's campaign advisor is in on it. Mitt's wife, herself smug, entitled, and out of touch, is in on it. Hell, even Mitt Romney is in on the vast left wing conspiracy.
Yeah, Mitt, it's a vast left wing conspiracy to make you look like a clueless cobag... since you are a clueless cobag, the entire fabric of the universe is wrapped up in this conspiracy. You can't buy friends, Mittens, and even your attempts to approximate a human personality go over like a lead balloon. Better stay away from public interaction going forward, it just cracks your lifelike facade.
UPDATE: I missed out on the obvious joke... GOP Presidential candidate Mitt Romney will be attacked by a vast left-wing conspiracy headed by Massachusetts governor Mitt Romney.