Thursday, March 24, 2016

Must Have Gotten a Diagnosis

I don't write much about Alex Jones, but I can't resist posting about his complete meltdown last week. Wow, talk about a complete farrago of whackaloon conspiracy theories... in under three-and-a-half minutes, Jones completely fills out a 'Conspiracy Bingo' card- we have aliens, the global elite, the media, vaccine manufacturers, Satan. Jones builds to a crescendo, ranting about the patrimony that has been stolen from him:


Humanity has got to get off world. We have access to life extension technologies. talk about discrimination...I want the advanced life extension!

I WANT TO GO TO SPACE. I WANT TO SEE INTERDIMENSIONAL TRAVEL. I WANT WHAT GOD PROMISED US. AND i WON'T SIT HERE AND WATCH SATAN STEAL IT!!! THAT'S THE FIGHT, THAT'S THE KEY!!



The really weird thing about it, to me, is that Jones claims to be religious, yet he wants advanced life extension technology... wouldn't such technology thwart the will of God? Isn't the notion of wanting to live forever in a corporeal state the very essence of original sin? Sounds like Jones has his theology messed up, just like he has his history, sociology, and political science messed up. I think he may be freaking out because he got a rough diagnosis... he should have taken care of his gut flora, but he displaced them by keeping his head wedged up his poop chute.

The only quibble I have with Jones' rant is that he didn't mention any deros, I can't take Jones seriously, the guy doesn't remember Lemuria. And another thing, do you think a guy like Alex Jones knows what the queers are doing to the soil?





I like Alex, he's not like the other people, here, in the trailer park.

8 comments:

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

I have seen the fnords, err redbuds!

In sunny locations in D.C. they came and went like Wildfire.

But some are still coming out on the shady side of the streets. I'm hoping to get to West Va. this weekend, that should be interesting.
~

M. Bouffant said...

I'd suspect A.J. has a very good idea of what the queers are doing to the soil.

Maybe we should take up a collection to let him see some interdimensional travel.

Smut Clyde said...

I WANT TO SEE ATTACK SHIPS ON FIRE OFF THE SHOULDER OF ORION. I WANT TO WATCH C-BEAMS GLITTER IN THE DARK NEAR THE TANNHAUSER GATE.

Nasreen Iqbal said...

I guess Alex Jones is serious. I mean, I assume he really does believe in the black helicopters.

The problem with entertainers who specialize in conspiracy theories is that I'm never quite sure that they believe what they're saying.

mikey said...

Seems to me the Christianists can pretty much get around any cognitive or logical inconsistency by shrugging and saying "well, I guess it must be gods will"...

Smut Clyde said...

but he displaced them by keeping his head wedged up his poop chute.

Frankly, I'm surprised the aliens find room for the anal probe.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

One of the kids I mentored in robotics, he was a fat, kind of antisocial kid, but we saw him kind of grow up a bit, and hope that maybe robotics helped. But having said that, he was never going to be the sharpest shovel in the toolkit.

I keep my FaceHell separate from the kids in taekwondo and robotics in general, figuring that zombie adult time is for adults, but once they graduate, you know fair warning and all.

But this kid, he went to college and found himself a bit in over his head. In addition, his mom had died when he was in Junior High, and his dad got weird. So I friended him on Facehell, and watched in dismay as he started to go full-on conspiracy nut. He was all-in on the Jade Helm for-de-rol, and often linked to InfoWars to support his flights of fancy. When I called him on it and linked to Snopes to debunk some Jonesian idiocy, he would respond "that's what people who are blind to the truth say". I finally cut him off on FB just before the Jade Helm thing turned into spoiled nothing burger, so dunno what happened to the guy after that.

But I blame Jones, at least partially, for the damage to this impressionable and vulnerable young man, and if I ever meet Alex, I figure he's earned a kick to the melon from me...

Smut Clyde said...

The only quibble I have with Jones' rant is that he didn't mention any deros,

A working-class dero, even.