Nine Nine Nine Tears

One of the more inane political figures of the past decade has been Herman Cain, a 2012 Republican presidential candidate whose platform and campaign slogan, which read like a fast food offer, I lampooned almost a decade ago. Well, Cain the Inane died as he lived, in a stupid and senseless manner, cut down by the 'Rona at the age of 74. Cain's death from COVID-19 was particularly ironic, in light of the lackadaisical manner in which he approached the pandemic:

I don't believe in karma, but I'm not so sure now... In a particularly ghoulish twist, as Cain was dying, his communications team was still making light of the illness which had struck down their boss:

Our government, and our media, have incinerated their credibility. So, is it any wonder that people are skeptical? #Coronavirus https://t.co/2IMVhLGbLn

— Herman Cain (@THEHermanCain) July 29, 2020

He gave his life for Trump, and to 'trigger the libs' by not wearing a mask. This is a case of history repeating as both tragedy AND farce, just the sort of 2-for-1 special old Herman Cain would have pushed as the CEO of a (by all accounts) terrible chain of fast food pizza joints. To mourn the man, I'm gonna cry 9-9-9 tears.

Herman Cain is not the only wingnut who has died of a hoax, Turning Point USA co-founder Bill Montgomery also died of COVID-19. Even as his carcass was stiffening, his organization was tweeting out dank memes to trigger the libs:

Yeah, I feel so owned right about now!

In a trifecta, the Stupidest Man in Congress has tested positive for COVID-19, having been screened just before joining the Dotard on Air Force One. He is claiming to be taking hydroxychloroquine for the 'rona. Among the drug's side effects are 'confusion, mania, hallucinations, paranoia, and psychosis', which are a normal state for Gohmert. I can't say I'd be too sorry to see the awful Gohmert croak... once again, I am tempted to start believing in karma.

On a bizarre side note, today I learned that Gohmert, like Ming the Merciless, has a sexy, rebellious daughter. This year keeps veering from tragedy to farce to cheesy sci-fi flick.