Tuesday, February 21, 2017

My Profile Picture Doesn't Look Bad Enough

The profile picture I've been using since this blog's inception was snapped by my friend Frenchie (who is, of course, Italian), a man I have known for almost twenty years. Ever since I've known him, he has taken headshots of his friends, and my photo was an impromptu one taken in the dojo on a Saturday morning between classes. This past Saturday, he took another round of headshots, which he then 'doctored' using an app on his phone. I initially protested that I hadn't shaved for a couple of days, to which he replied, "That's good, it makes you look tougher." In order to make us look even 'tougher', he played with the contrast, darkened the image, and applied a red filter so we all looked like we'd be fighting (which we had been). I now present the publicity still for Frank Miller's 'Bastard City', a Quentin Tarantino Production:




Funny, I could swear that I had blue eyes...

After he took this picture, he took one of our mutual friend and colleague, Kickass Sue. Sue has a baby face, with a snub nose and wide eyes... while she is extremely tough, she is incapable of looking 'mean'. After Frenchie took her picture and played with the images, he showed it to her and her verdict was, "I don't look tough, I look drunk!"

I look drunk too, drunk on baaaaadness.
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6 comments:

  1. M. BouffantFebruary 21, 2017 at 11:49 PM

    Now I don't mean nothin' by this no how, one way or t'other, but your altered representation sorta looks like (a younger) Bruce Willis, esp. around the eyes.

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  2. Vixen StrangelyFebruary 22, 2017 at 12:29 AM

    Nay--I think it's sort of a cross between Jason Statham and Mickey Rourke. (Jason Statham for tough, pre all the putting the face back together Rourke of Barfly for the kind of drunk look). I'm nearly tempted to put my punim on the interwebs but this is, I have been led to believe, a shambles for internet women to do.

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  3. Big Bad Bald BastardFebruary 22, 2017 at 12:46 AM

    Thanks, I've also gotten Steve Austin. Most of the women who hit on me are WWE fans, to my dismay.

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  4. Vixen StrangelyFebruary 22, 2017 at 1:28 AM

    Srsly? It's probably shoot, not work, tho. So you've got that.

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  5. DerFarmFebruary 22, 2017 at 9:02 AM

    I like the original.

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  6. Big Bad Bald BastardFebruary 22, 2017 at 10:22 PM

    I like the original.

    Yeah, gonna stick with it. This one is for comedic purposes.

    Looks too nice....not at all a bad bastard. You are even smiling!

    Yeah, but that's when you've got to watch out.

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