Hastert the Unspeakable

Tengrain has been working the Hastert scandal beat, which has morphed from an indictment for lying to the FBI about suspicious cash withdrawals to a full-blown sexual scandal involving at least one schoolboy. Tengrain notes a particular irony about Hastert's indictment:


Essentially it sounds like Hastert was being blackmailed by Person A (and the indictment uses the masculine pronoun) and was paying him off in multiple payments to avoid detection (“structuring,” which ironically is a War on Drugs requirement to track large cash withdrawals and deposits enacted during the Bush Years when he was Speaker of the House) and of course, lying to the Feds about it, too.


Looks like Hastert was hoist on his own pedotard.

It's been a crazy week for Conservative sex scandals, from the Josh Duggar diddling scandal to this current hastertion. Is it any wonder that teens are fleeing religion like alert Duggar girls flee Josh? In the face of this embarrassing implosion, certain righties are trying to build an unconvincing "both sides are equally bad narrative by dredging up an article that Sanders wrote for a Vermont publication in 1972. The shocking statement from Bernie back in the post hippie-era hangover?


A man goes home and masturbates his typical fantasy. A woman on her knees, a woman tied up, a woman abused.

A woman enjoys intercourse with her man — as she fantasizes being raped by 3 men simultaneously.

The man and woman get dressed up on Sunday — and go to Church, or maybe to their "revolutionary" political meeting.

Have you ever looked at Stag, Man, Hero, Tough magazines on the shelf at your local bookstore? Do you know why newspapers with the articles like "Girl 12 raped by 14 men" sell so well? To what in us are they appealing?

A simple Google search should be enough to demonstrate that Bernie was exactly right about the sexual fantasies of some people, and as long as it's all done in a consensual fashion, with respect for limits and personal safety, it's all good. Hell, the kinks Bernie described were pretty pedestrian compared to stuff like vore and furry sexuality. Besides, Bernie was not approving of this kink:


Women, for their own preservation, are trying to pull themselves together. And it's necessary for all of humanity that they do so. Slavishness on one hand breeds pigness on the other hand. Pigness on one hand breeds slavishness on the other. Men and women — both are losers. Women adapt themselves to fill the needs of men, and men adapt themselves to fill the needs of women. In the beginning there were strong men who killed the animals and brought home the food — and the dependent women who cooked it. No More! Only the roles remain — waiting to be shaken off. There are no "human" oppressors. Oppressors have lost their humanity. On one hand "slavishness," on the other hand "pigness." Six of one, half dozen of the other. Who wins?


This reads like something which wouldn't be out of place in the Meese Report, so what's the fuss? At any rate, trying to kickstart a false scandal involving something Bernie wrote shortly before the future Speaker did something unspeakable is insincere and unconvincing. Simply put, Bernie was a bit of an alarmist, but Hastert was a monster.

Post title references this. For some extra Erol Otus-y goodness, there's always this lovely rendition- which happens to be a lot less creepy than Denny.